My father passed away in March 2007. He died from acute myocardiac ischemia (heart attack), secondary to underlying diabetes mellitus and renal failure. I was with at his bedside in the intensive care throughout the last week of his life.
It is our cultural belief that one should preferably depart from one's own home. We had made prior arrangement with the hospital staff to alert us should his condition turned for the worse, so that we could bring him home before he passed on.When his condition deteriorated on the fateful morning of 30th March, the hospital staff promptly summoned us.
Immediately, the ambulance officers were alerted, and my father was rushed home all the way from the hospital in Penang Island. I sat in the ambulance and accompanied by father who was lying unconscious on the stretcher throughout the journey, while my sisters led the ambulance in another car. My father was on ventilator support as he was unable to breath by himself. I bagged him via the ventilator bag, and had to constantly whisper to him that we were on our way home.
I have resuscitated many dying patients throughout my career previously, but bagging my father to maintain his breathing was something that I had never thought off. While trying to soothe him that we were going home and asked him not to worry, memories of the happy times we spent together flashes through my mind intermittently.
When we reached home and disembark from the ambulance, I told my dad that we had arrived at our home - and I could never forget what happened next - my father suddenly opened his eyes widely, as if acknowledging his return. I extubated him subsequently and he passed away peacefully, in the company my mother and all his children.
My father was hospitalized initially for breathlessness, and subsequently found to have renal failure requiring dialysis. He had a heart attack during dialysis, and had to be put on ventilator support. He was still aware of the surrounding but unable to to move his limbs or talk while being treated in ICU. He was there for about one week. The day before his death, he became more alert and able to acknowledge our presence by nodding his head whenever we talked to him. I thought he might be able to pull through this time. Hence, it came as a shock to my siblings and I when he suddenly deteriorated the following day. The Chinese saying "回光返照“ (a phenomenon where a person who is dying suddenly becomes alert and chirpy the day before he expires) is real after all.
I am the eldest son the family. I had always done well in my primary school days. In those days, many of us would have continued our secondary school education in our hometown. To my surprise, my father had helped to get me enroll into Chung Ling High School (the renowned secondary school in Penang Island) instead. This paved the way for my eventual achievements in later years - I did well in my secondary 3 and secondary 5 major examinations, came to Singapore for my A Level study in Hwa Chong Junior College under Asean Scholarships, and the completed my medicine undergraduate course in Singapore.
Even though we hardly engaged in long conversations, I could sense that my father was quite proud of my achievements. I treasured every moment spent with him previously - waiting for him to return home at night and then going out for supper together whenever I returned home from Singapore. We ate a lot of Bak Kut Teh for supper at one stage!
Looking back, I should have spend more time with him previously ...
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| My parents |
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| My dad and Cheng Yee (top) / Cheng Jie (bottom) |
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| My dad and Cheng Kai |
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