难得糊涂

要活得开心，有时候的确要懵懂一些！
有些事情知道了,不但于事无补，反而会增添无谓的困扰！
毕竟无论发生什么烦人的事情，地球还是继续转动，当事者还是要照样过活。时间不会因为我们的情绪波动而暂停。

那些事还是不知为妙呢？

人言可畏，如果没有听到别人的闲言闲语，便不会心存不快，大喊冤枉！
人比人气死人，没有探听到某某人突然飞黄腾达、住洋房、驾大车，心理便不会不平衡，反思为何那个人不是我？
刻意的去追究到底某某人的隐私，因为只知其一而不知其二，可能会加剧彼此的误解，令辛苦经营的互信全盘崩溃。

我处世的态度是凡事要尽量做得问心无愧。防人之心不可无，但害人之意万万不可有。
我不会刻意去聊别人的是非，挖他人的糗事；对于流传在外的闲言闲语，也只是听过便是，决不刻意牢记在心。凡事尽量看得开，避免钻牛角尖。

也许有人会觉得这种认识态度有点阿Q；不过难得糊涂，生活反而会好过些！

电影情怀

我就读初中四的儿子靖捷那天问我，为何好久没有去看电影啦？

其实并不是不喜欢看电影，而是年过五十的我，去电影院看戏的兴致已经没有年轻时那么浓厚了！现在网际网络这么普及，不用上电影院都能舒舒服服的在家里的平板电脑观赏心怡的影片，无需费时驾车到电影院，排队领取预订的戏票，也不用因为买不到好座位而懊恼！犹有胜者，可以随心所欲掌握影片的进度，暂停（去喝杯水，小解），倒退（重温所漏掉的片段）或加速前进（因节奏太慢而捉狂时）。另外总觉得戏票似乎越来越贵了！当然，经过了几十年的岁月，也无需从电影情节来体会人生啦。

念中学时，曾经有过每星期看一部电影的记录。到新加坡读高中时，因为所住的宿舍离开市区又一段距离，功课也蛮繁重，看电影的次数稍微减少，不过也几乎每一、俩个月都会往戏院逛。上了大学后，偶尔还会到离宿舍不远的金文泰市镇的那几间戏院光顾。毕业后，孤家寡人时，也会常常往戏院打发时间。

年幼时，是发梦的时期。小时很喜欢武打片，后来也迷上琼瑶式的文艺爱情片，后来比较迷恋于好莱坞大型制作的灾难、科幻片，以及徐克式的武侠奇幻惊险片、成龙的警匪片。有一阵子，僵尸先生系列电影也蛮精彩！

通常我都是独来独往，看我喜欢的电影。直到结交异性朋友时，才有人陪着看戏。当然，陪我看戏最多的要归我的老婆。不过后来才发现，她是醉翁之意不在酒，所看过的戏或戏里的某些情节，她多数都忘记了！或许真该向她要回以前的戏票钱！

渐渐销声匿迹的情书

随着通讯科技的发展，人与人之间的联络方式跟二、三十年前相比，显然有天壤之别。

互联网还没有发达之前，要同远地的朋友沟通，除了打电话，便只有书信。虽然有电报，但它不止收费高，还需要特地赶到指定场所才能发送那短短的几行字z出去，运用它的人可想而知寥寥无几。

以往书信可说是互通消息及表达情感的最佳途径之一。小时候曾经结交笔友，发信后等待回信的那种渴望的心情，及接到信件后那种兴奋，我想只有亲历者才能深深的体会到。

犹记得在90年初与女友（亦即现任老婆）拍拖的那段时期，除了褒电话粥外，还写了不少情书。那一年的六月长假，她随同事到北京去进修关于中国文学的课程；在那短短的几个星期，我几乎每个星期都会寄上一封信，聊表牵过之情。我觉得情书对于木呐、不善言语的人相当管用，可以在白纸上任意的表达深藏内心里的情怀。

随着无线宽频网络的普及，几乎每人都拥有智能手机，人与人的距离无形中被拉近了很多。只要手机一按，便能与远在国外的友人联络上并闲聊，或在荧幕上见面。只需用手指轻轻的按下几句的留言，眨眼间对方便能接收到；在短短的几分钟一来一往的讯息传送，一切皆一览无余。用情书传送爱意的过程太缓慢。。。看来情书真的要步上恐龙的后尘啦！

人生无常

最近所发生的马航飞机失联事故（乘客们应该是沉没于南印度洋深海里，凶多吉少），以及前天报章报道某电单车骑士被夹毙于停顿前面的巴士和从后面因刹车器失灵飞驰而来的大卡车之间的车祸，令我感触良多。人类的生命，看来真的很脆弱，冥冥中似乎有所主宰，就是这么巧在某一个时候出现在某个地方，这么不幸的纠缠于种种的环节里，莫名其妙的遭受到祸害。

是因果吗？抑或是上天的安排？
往往遭受最大打击的不是往生者，而是被遗留下来的亲人。生离死别的痛苦煎熬，尤其是英年早逝，白头人送黑头人这种情况，最为难受！

因为我的职责所在，有好几次遇到了年幼儿童因突发性疾病（脑炎，脑溢血，急性肺炎，败血症）的恶化，病入膏肓，无法挽救。父母亲目睹已经毫无意识的幼儿在死亡边沿徘徊，最终撒手离去，那种无助，无奈的悲愤表情，那种震撼人心的哭泣呐喊，是多么的凄凉！常常我的眼眶也不期然的泛滥起来！

世事难料，人各有天命。我们能做的，也只有好好把握此刻及珍惜周围的亲朋戚友，别虚度了这一生！

梦见爸爸

昨天做了个很奇怪的梦。
梦中迷迷糊糊的来到父亲工作的小贩摊位，看到爸爸如往常般面对着墙壁，起劲的在煮炒。我叫了几声爸爸，但都没得到回应。
我潜意识中还明瞭这只是梦境，不可能是真的，因为爸爸已经去世好几年了。为了求证，我伸手试图拍了拍爸爸的肩膀；原以为应该好像电影情节，我的手会透过爸爸的肩膀，摸不着。出乎意料的，我居然摸到了爸爸硬硬的肩膀，但他还是没有回过头来看我！
我顿时慌了！真的是爸爸回来了吗？为什么他不回头来看我呢？生气了吗？为什么生气呢？。。。接下来犹如电影场景突然换画，一切影像都消失得无影无踪。而我又仿佛掉进另外一个梦境去了！

已经好久没有梦见爸爸。

上一次梦见爸爸时，又是另外一种意境。在梦境中，我出现在一个寂静的小村落。青绿的草地铺盖着黄泥，稀疏的茅草屋分布在整个村落的几个角落，淡淡的轻烟弥漫整个空间。突然间发现爸爸独自朝村落的某一个方向走去。我匆忙的跟上去，问爸爸要往那里去；他只是看着我，没有回答我的问题。我再问他，需要我陪他一起步行过去吗，他只是嘴唇稍微掂开，发出无声的微笑，转过身子，继续向前走，渐渐消失在我眼前。。。（也就在这时候，我从梦中醒来！）

对于爸爸，总觉得有很多亏欠。很怀念陪他去吃夜宵的那段日子：中学时，先是他用摩托车载我；直到我考上驾车执照，家里拥有车后（已经是念大学的时候），便轮到我载他去夜宵。往往父亲都是在晚上11点后才回家。而我也会特地熬夜，等到他骑着摩多车回家，再询问他要不要去夜宵。其实我们彼此也没有多说什么话，只是为彼此添饭盛茶，而时间也慢慢的在彼此无形的关怀中流逝。

First camera

In my early childhood days, my family never owned any camera. The only photos that were captured were those of family or wedding photos. I still remember the old black and white family photo hanging on the wall in my parents bedroom, with my siblings and I crowding around my parents, wearing new dresses/clothes with hair meticulously combed. The photo was taken in a photo shop in town. The other occasions for photo taking was during prize presentation for being the top three students in classes during primary school years. All the students would line up in front of the camera, with headmaster on the extreme end, for the shot. Those photos were again in black and white only.

Family photo

Taken in Primary One

The first time I had a hands-on experience with camera was during Primary 5. For some unknown reason, my sister and I decided to rent a camera from a camera-cum-photography shop in town to try out photography (snapping pictures of ourselves). Needless to say, all of us (the siblings) were very excited. We had to learn how to operate the camera - "always remember to wind the handle after every shot"-  reminded the shop owner. Of course, he loaded the roll of film into the camera for us. We took 24 photos (as we only bought one roll of film) on that day. We took some photos at home, and cycled to a bungalow nearby for shots in the garden.

I bought my first camera (probably the first for the family too, I think) when I came to Singapore with my fellow classmates for the Asean Scholarship interview (after completing Form 5). I bought a simple / compact point and shoot Yashica camera then - nothing fanciful, but I was nevertheless thrill by the thoughts of owning a camera finally. But of course, I didn't make much use of it because the cost of purchasing rolls of films and developing the photos was quite daunting for penniless students. After I graduated and started to work, I bought a Fuji compact camera (took some snapshots of houseman canteen and houseman quarters), and subsequently a Canon DSLR camera (just in time for courtship and subsequently honeymoon). When the kids came along, I found that carrying the Canon DSLR camera with its lens was rather cumbersome, particularly when you had to attend to the kids and their belongings. I eventually settled for another compact Fuji Camera when I was studying in United States. The old Canon camera had been left rusting away in the store room since 1997.

Digital camera begins to rule the world in year 2000. I bought a compact Canon digital camera in year 2000. It worked for about 2-3 years, then the sliding cover for the lens started to cause problem (unable to close and open smoothly, despite replacement). I bought another Canon camera (which is still working to date),  followed by a Sony cybershot (for my daughter Chengyee, but it was damaged by sand particles during our trip to Kangaroo Island, Australia), a Fuji Prosumer camera (given to Cheng Yee) and a Sony Prosumer Camera (used by yours truly). For all intent and purposes, my current Sony camera has served its function very well. It can zoom up to 30x, and does not require any changes in lens. The thoughts of buying a higher end mirrorless camera flash through my minds several times; but ultimately I feel that I don't need a flashy camera to take good photos, but rather the energies to overcome the inertia of venturing outdoors for photography!

Glimpses of my neighbourhood

I have been staying in my new home for over 6 months. The surrounding of my new neighbourhood is rather tranquil and refreshing. The housing estate has been there for over 50 years (if I am not mistaken), but I am pleasantly surprised by how well the place is maintained. It even has bonsai-like plants decorating one corner of the estate!

The old housing estate

The condominium that I am staying is located along Geylang River. Jogging trails have been built along both sides of the river, for the convenience of the residents nearby.

The condominium I am staying in

My unit is facing the river; the jogging trail along the river bank

Seats along the jogging trail

Boat park along the river bank - for rangers to inspect/clear the river

The view from my balcony is a panacea for stressful mind...

The walkway leading to our condominium is rather picturesque.

Best of all, the famous hawker centre which serves sumptous and delicious foods and two Circle Line MRT stations are within walking distance from my place of residence.

Walking towards hawker centre

Enough said. What else can I complain?